Who was that man, and what has he done with Mitt Romney? The Republican presidential nominee was more cheerful, more prepared, more specific, more informed and more energetic than President Obama tonight, resulting in a genuine rout. Romney seemed eager to answer every question, Obama looked peeved and sluggish. For every straw man argument the president raised, his challenger offered a lengthy and detailed rebuttal, in full command of the facts.

Democratic surrogates in the cable TV spin rooms Wednesday night seemed to have trouble explaining President Barack Obama's weak debate performance. By Thursday morning, however, the Obama campaign had settled on a explanation for why their guy lost: Mitt Romney lied.

I have spent the past few days sequestered with a crack team of political pros — actually, curled into a fetal ball, clutching a fading 1980 John Anderson poster — to gird myself for the vital first debate between President Obama and Mitt Romney.

So many questions lingered:

Would Romney offer to wager Obama $10,000 on who wins the race?

Would Obama tell Romney, "You're taxable enough, Mitt"?